Driving In Cars With Boys
by XmidnightloverX
Summary: Castiel Novak would rather fade into the background than try to meet his family's expectations. Then meets Dean Winchester who unwittingly challenges everything he believes in. Dean Winchester is stuck between following his gut or following his heart and he would rather get stoned than decide if it's worth neglecting his duty as a hunter.
1. Six Perfect Kids

**Disclaimer:** Destiel would be cannon if I owned Supernatural. Also there are some heavy themes in this (Because I'm incapable of writing anything happy. Ever.) I'll try to mention trigger warnings in the beginning of chapters but if you're very sensitive to such I wouldn't read this. Just so ya'll are aware.

* * *

**Chapter One: **Six Perfect Kids

_An honest witness does not deceive,  
__but a false witness pours out lies.  
~Proverbs 14:5_

* * *

The Novak's are, among other things, deceitful. It was a side effect from the years of being dishonest in order to meet the expectations placed upon them. It was exhausting, a terrible amount of work but a necessary evil, in Castiel's eyes at least.

"We're only human," their mother said once, sitting in the driver's seat of their parked minivan, her face in her hands. This was after they ran into a women who attended their church in the grocery store, and overheard twelve year old Gabriel cuss at his twin sister Rachael. She wrinkled her nose in distaste. "I would have expected preacher's kids to behave better."

"You're the one who named us after angels, Mom," Gabriel sassed from the backseat.

"An obvious lapse in judgment," she replied, with an equal amount of attitude.

There were few times he had seen his family blatantly lie, except for when they had to explain why one of there was one less Novak son. Castiel was thirteen, and didn't know how to respond to questions that he wasn't allowed to answer. An intrusive women sat in the pew behind them and asked the closet Novak child to her, which happened to be Castiel, "Aren't there six of you?"

Castiel froze but Gabriel leaned over him. "Luca is doing volunteer work with the Christian Youth Corporation."

The women placed a hand over her heart. "Really? In what field?"

"He's helping feed the homeless." He lied without a care, as Castiel stared at his brother in wonder.

"What a darling boy."

Gabriel smiled. "He really is."

It was because of this that Castiel had no doubt his brother was lying to him right now. "It should only take a couple hours," he was saying, an earnest look on his face. "And then I'll definitely boost my Physics grade from a C to a B."

"Good luck convincing Mom and Dad with that," was Castiel's only response.

"How quickly you distrust me. I'm insulted, little brother." Gabriel says as Castiel rolls his eyes. Gabriel let out a huff. "Alright, what gave me away?"

"Besides the fact that you have a D in Physics? You have never displayed that much excitement to go to a study group in the past, why would now be any different unless you're lying?"

Gabriel narrows his eyes. "You're much too observant for your own good, Cassie. I think they'll fall for it. They know I always pull my grades up before the semester ends. Cover for me though, yeah?"

He had a point. His report card was always up to the Novak requirements. Gabriel liked to be laid back, which meant procrastinating until the last minute where he would surprise his teacher's with thoughtful and intelligent work.

Castiel sighs, "I'll try."

"Thanks, Cassie," his brother says, ruffling his hair and practically bouncing out of Castiel's room. They've had their own rooms for over two years now but Gabriel was frequently in his room to use the dinosaur of a computer that sat mostly untouched in the corner. It was the only computer in house besides the laptop but that wasn't allowed to leave the living room.

Castiel wastes an hour in his room before dressing (polo shirt, khakis, standard Novak outfit) and meeting his family for a late breakfast before they leave to prepare for the church barbeque. Exactly what Gabriel is trying to weasel out of.

"Mr. Lancaster had to go to the hospital yesterday. His wife says he can't maintain his blood sugar with the flu," his mother is saying as Castiel takes a seat at the table next to his younger sister Hael.

"We must remember to pray for him and his family," his father says. "Rachael, no reading at the table please. Meals are family time, remember."

Rachael reluctantly sets her book down and takes a bite of her pancake. "Is Mikey coming for breakfast?"

"No, Michael won't be able to make it until the barbeque." He pauses, and glances around the table. Castiel notices the way his lips move slightly, as he counts his children. "Where's Gabriel?"

"He has a study group," Mom says.

"At nine-thirty?"

"It's for Physics," she says this slower, as if doubting the sincerity of the statement.

"He said Cousin Naomi was going to be there," Castiel inserts. Which isn't technically a lie. Gabriel did say it, although Castiel doubted his cousin would actually be there.

Dad frowns. "No, I'm positive Naomi will be attending the cookout today. If you excuse me, I'm going to make a call to Gabriel."

"Is Gabe gonna get be trouble?" Hael asks curiously, when there father enters the next room.

"Is he ever not in trouble?" Mom says, a tone of defeat in her voice.

Rachael shakes her head in disappointment and returns to her book.

* * *

Castiel stands stiffly next to the grill as his father cooks. Michael is helping the elderly make their plates and Rachael is doing the same with children, leaving Castiel to stand idly until someone asks for assistance or his father gives him further instructions. The Novak's were hosting this cookout, so it was their duty to be helpful.

It's just like Michael and Rachael to be the first to help. They both had the strong urge to please their parents, the urge to do good. Perhaps it came from both being the eldest for their gender, maybe it placed unnecessary responsibility on their shoulders.

Castiel's siblings each had distinct personalities. Michael and Rachael were the overachievers. Michael was more of an athlete and Rachael is more involved academically. Gabriel was a wild child -although never as wild as Luca. He had a quick temper and a playful attitude. Hael was the baby of the family. A bite of brat at times, but ultimately a sweetheart. Then there's Castiel. Who was just _there. _

He did good in school, not excelling like Rachael. He did volunteer work, never going above and beyond like Michael. He followed rules. It was easier that way. There was less pressure, less stress, it was simpler.

Simple was good.

"Hey, Cassie," Castiel's cousin Naomi said, approaching him. He smiled and greeted her. They exchanged pleasantries, and Castiel waited patiently for her to get to the purpose of her speaking to him. Naomi was a "popular girl" and usually didn't like speaking to Castiel unless she was obligated to.

"So, Cassie," Naomi said, attempting to sound casual and failing. "Is it true your brother proposed to that harlot?"

Castiel sent an anxious look at his father but he was thankfully in a deep conversation with someone else. "Where did you hear that?"

"From Rapheal, that blabbermouth," she says with a scoff in her brother's direction.

Castiel frowns. "Did you ask Luca?"

Naomi looks at him like she's seriously considering he's mentally challenged. "No. He hates me."

He didn't doubt that. Lucifer hated obnoxious people on principle. "Hate's a strong word. I honestly don't know if he has or not. We aren't exactly close."

"Could you ask him for me?"

Castiel fought the urge to roll his eyes. "You could ask him yourself Naomi. Even if he dislikes you, he wouldn't be hostile towards you without a reason."

"Mmm," she hums, thoughtfully."I think I'm gonna check out that cutie instead. I heard he's new in town, maybe I can give him a tour." She winks which makes Castiel think she is insinuating something sexual.

"Have fun with that," Castiel says but she's already drifted away.

Castiel scans the area for his older brother. Most people avoid Lucifer like the plague, which makes Castiel wonder why their father insists he comes to church functions. Off in the furthest corner of their backyard, Lucifer is sitting on the backdoor steps by himself. His girlfriend, Caroline, is nowhere in sight.

With a sigh, he makes his way over to him. He doesn't look up as Castiel takes a seat next to him. Headphones are blaring in his ears, Castiel can't make out what's playing but it's something loud and heavy.

"What are you listening to?" he asks.

Lucifer smirks and offers him an earphone. Castiel tries not to look too eager as he puts it in. Their parents were very strict about media when they were children but Lucifer always followed his own rules. When Castiel was around eleven, he was captivated by the music that pooled from his older brother's bedroom. Lucifer took him under his wing, introducing him to a new world and for that Castiel would always be appreciative towards him.

"Do you like it?" Lucifer questions. "It was my favorite band when I was your age."

Castiel tilts his head to the side. "It's very...Angry."

He winks at his younger brother. "Explains why I liked it, yeah?"

"Are you angry, Luca?"

Lucifer jerked at the sudden question. "Yeah, I suppose I am. I mean, I'm nineteen, live on my own and I still have to do everything my ol' man says. There's a bunch of idiots staring at me. It's a fucking million degrees in the middle of September and I'm in long sleeved shirt. Man, it's surprising I'm not more pissed."

Lucifer is only nineteen but he moved out when he was sixteen, sharing an apartment with Caroline. Their parents never fully forgave him for it, but Castiel secretly felt it was a smart thing to do, it stopped a great deal of the arguments in their house.

"Did you propose to Caroline?"

Lucifer eyes him warily. "You don't beat around the bush, do you Cassie?"

"You didn't answer my question."

A tentative look comes across Lucifer's face. "Yeah, I did. She's pregnant, which isn't the only reason I did it, but wow, y'know? My baby is inside of her, which is a fucking stupid thing to say but it's so different when you're in this position."

"I'm glad you're happy."

"Thanks, but, don't tell Mom or Dad yet, ok? I will tell them but I just need some time, y'know?"

"I'll try," Castiel says, standing up and stretching.

Lucifer gives him a mischievous look. "Thanks kid. Feel free to pop in at mines anytime you want to get away."

Castiel nods, but severely doubts his father would allow him to visit Lucifer's apartment anytime soon. He spends the rest of the cookout, wandering about, playing a quick game of Frisbee with Hael, chatting with church goers and finally cleaning up the mess they left behind.

He was bringing the trash to the curb when he caught sight of a boy around his age. He was tall, maybe a few inches taller than Castiel. He wore a leather jacket despite the obvious heat. Castiel nodded at him as he took care of the trash, trying to ignore the sudden flush in his cheeks when the boy smiled back.

"If there's anything I can't stand," the boy starts, a devilish grin edging on the corner of his mouth. "It's a perfect kid. And _six_ of 'em, yesh."

Castiel gives him a curious look. "Are you referencing something?"

"Uh," he scratches the back of his neck. "Yeah, the _Brady Bunch. _Sorry, my little brother's like obsessed."

"That's a television show, right?"

"Dude, yeah. It's the _Brady Bunch." _He says this like one would say the name of the president, as though it's information everyone should know.

Castiel fidgeted. "We're not really allowed to watch TV that much."

The boy blinks. "Oh, shit. You're one of those six, aren't you?"

"I suppose."

"Sorry, man. I just moved in 'round the corner." He says, chuckling a bit. "I'm Dean Winchester. Is it true you're all named after angels?"

Castiel nods. It wasn't the first time he was asked that question and he doubted it would be the last. "Yeah, I'm Castiel."

"Nice to meet you Cas."

Castiel's stomach lurches at that. No one has ever called him that before. His father says their given names and everyone else just calls him Cassie. It wasn't a good enough reason for flutters to build in his chest, but in a life of monotony, anything new is absolutely exhilarating .

"Nice to meet you, as well, Dean."

Dean smiles. "Well, I've got to hunt down my brother. I swear to God, he was next to me two seconds ago. See you around, Cas."

Castiel tried not to stare as he walked away but it was as if his eyes had a mind of their own. "See you around, Dean Winchester."


	2. Obedient, Faithful, Robot

**Chapter Two: **Obedient, Faithful, Robot

_Surely there is not a righteous man on earth who does good and never sins. _  
_~Ecclesiastes 7:20_

* * *

Castiel hauled the mobile picnic tables to the garage with difficulty. Usually Gabriel would lend a hand, but Castiel hadn't seen him since that morning. Their father must be _livid. _

A twinge of apprehension fluttered in Castiel's chest. It wasn't unusual for Gabriel to push their father's limits, but it was rare for him to ignore a direct order from his father. The younger kids all learned that lesson through Lucifer. He bite back his worry and continue lugging the tables in the garage.

Three older brothers and Castiel was the only one doing the manual labor.

A clatter echoed from inside the garage and Castiel paused before lifting the door. With a tentative step forward, he pressed an ear to the door. He couldn't make out any words, but there were definitely shouting coming from inside. Although, the voices sounded so similar Castiel almost took it for one person.

Most the children in the Novak household had dynamic personalities, so it wasn't odd for an argument to occur. However, it was rare for them to get violent, not because they didn't have the anger. No, Castiel had no doubt his siblings were angry enough to cause damage but because there was always someone calmer who could hold the other back.

Deciding it was better to go in and stop the fight than let it drag on, he lifted the door.

"Fuck you, you fucking motherfuck!" Lucifer shouted from one side of the garage.

Michael barked a laugh. "Smooth comeback, little brother. You never fail to surprise me."

Surprisingly, neither of the boys showed any signs of physical damage, besides Michael's bloody knuckles. The boxes that were usually stacked in orderly piles had toppled into a mess on the ground around them. Their clothes were rumpled. Lucifer was breathing heavily and with his blond hair in disarray around his head, he resembled a mad man.

"You think you're better than me?" Lucifer said, smiling a wicked grin that always made Michael snap. "News flash! You're just as fucked up as the rest of us. You just hide it better."

"Shut up," Michael grunted, his fists clenching.

Lucifer's grin widened. "What's wrong, big brother? Does it hurt to hear me speak the truth?"

"You've never bothered me. And you never will."

"We both know that's a lie. Face it, _Mikey," _he said his brother's name the same way one would utter the name of a particularly disgusting insect. "You're jealous of me. You've always been jealous of me. Because I'm younger and I could have fun, I could fuck girls and skip school. I could do whatever the hell I wanted while you pretended to be the good son Dad wants you to be. It kills you inside, doesn't it? Because you want to be bad. You have urges so deep inside you feel like they're clawing the inside of your mind-"

With a guttural sound that resembled more of an animal, Michael launched himself at his brother. Lucifer skirted out of the way, only to be tripped by the piles of boxes. Michael pulled him by the front of his shirt, holding Lucifer so close to him he could kiss the boy.

Castiel yelped, causing Michael to pause. Lucifer quickly took this opportunity to scramble away from his elder brother to the other side of the garage. Michael stared at the spot Lucifer was, and the three boys stood in perfect silence for a moment.

Michael finally spoke. "I think it's time for you to go home, Lucifer. Cassie could you help me clean up?"

"Left this shithole once, don't think I can't do it again," Lucifer muttered before sauntering away.

And thus, Castiel spend another hour of his day cleaning a mess he didn't create.

* * *

"Have you seen your brother?" His father asked from the doorway of his bedroom. Castiel pulled his headphones out, turning the volume down so his father wouldn't ask what was playing. He knew from his tone of voice that he was talking about Gabriel.

"Not since this morning." The worry from earlier tingled in his chest again.

His father ran frustrated hand over his face, a trait Castiel often noticed in his elder brothers. "Did he say where he was going? I mean, _really _going?

Castiel shook his head.

"That's just perfect." His father stormed away without another word.

Biting his lip, Castiel stuck his headphones back in. A moment later, he felt the weight shift in his bed. Rachael was sitting next to him, her knees drawn under her chin. She held a hand out wordlessly for a headphone and cringed when she heard the song. "That was the last thing I would expect you to be listening to," she said, although she was smiling.

"Were you expecting Gospel music?"

"Actually, yes I was."

He rolled his eyes. "Are you worried about Gabe?"

She sighed. "A bit. He's always wanted to get away, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that he finally has."

Castiel blinked. "You think he ran away."

"You know he wants to," Rachael let out another sigh. "I just hoped that he would take me with him. Gosh, I hope he's not in trouble."

"Gabriel has a knack for avoiding trouble."

She bit back a smile. "He's always been the luckier twin. But I just have a bad feeling."

She didn't elaborate anymore, and Castiel ran out of questions to ask so they sat quietly and listened to Castiel's playlist. Eventually, Rachael's eyelids drooped and she fell asleep on Castiel's shoulder. He didn't want to wake her but his back was starting to cramp.

The front door slammed downstairs and Rachael bolted upright. "Gabe," she murmured under her breath and was out of the room before Castiel could take another breath. Castiel followed, stretching his sore muscles along the way.

Their parents were standing in the living room, with a tired looking Gabriel. Their mother looked on the verge of tears and their father looked like he wanted a drink.

"I don't want to see you leave your room again unless it's for meal or chores. You're grounded, Gabriel. For the duration of the summer. Do you understand me Gabriel Zechariah?"

"Yes," Gabriel replied in a monotone.

"Are you intoxicated?" Their father asked in disbelief.

"No."

"You're lying."

"Jesus Christ, it's impossible to please you." Gabriel laughed bitterly. "But we already knew that."

Their father looked like he desperately wanted to discipline him for using the Lord's vain, but their mother spoke before he could say anything. "Why are you acting like this?"

"Because it's funny." He said this like it was the punchline to a joke he was stringing them along with.

"I _knew _this would happen if we allowed him to associate with those delinquents," their father said, addressing their mother this time. "Look at the influence they have over him."

"Gabriel has always been surly," their mother said. It sounded almost like a plee.

"I'm right here. Why don't you fucking talk to me instead of about me?"

In the blink of an eye, their father slapped Gabriel. In that moment, everyone in the room shifted away from the pair. This didn't concern them."Do not use that kind of language under my roof. Who do you think you are?"

"Your son."

"No son of mine would behave like this," he said and his hand twitched, like he was tempted to slap Gabriel again. "I am not one of your criminal friends. I am your father and you will respect me."

Gabriel disregarded almost everything in that sentence. "There's nothing wrong with my friends!" His fists clenched and he was practically gnawing on his bottom lip in anger. "They're better people than you'll ever be.

Their father laughed abruptly. "Funny, you don't see me overdosing every weekend, do you? Or skipping school to loiter at the mall? I actually contribute to society."

"You know nothing about them-"

They're trailer trash," He exploded. "They're going no where and have nothing better to do than to drag you down with them. You think they care about you? They don't care about anyone. They're too full of evil and sin to be compassionate to anyone else. All they have room for in their hearts are drugs, and sex and partying."

Gabriel's face was expressionless. "Funny," he said, but it came out almost like a whisper. "I thought God was the only one who was allowed to Judge."

"I'm only looking out for you, son."

"No," Gabriel said. His face was flushed with anger, but his voice was lifeless. As if the energy had been sucked out of him. "You only care about you, Dad. You don't want people from church seeing me hanging around with trailer trash. Well, I don't give a shit what you think."

"You are forbidden from seeing them," Their father said, ignoring Gabriel's words. "From now on you will spend your free time with more wholesome people. People from your youth group."

"You can't dictate who my friends are-"

"I can and I will. "

Gabriel glared at their father with so much hostility, Castiel almost expected he'd burn a hole through their father's face. In an eerily calm voice he said, "I hate you. I hate it here. One day I'm going to leave, and I'm never coming back."

"Maybe I won't want you back," Their father said, causing their mother to gasp behind him. He lifted a finger to silence her. "Maybe I don't want a son like you."

"Have you ever considered maybe you're just a shitty parent?"

"There's living proof that I'm not."

Everyone's eyes went to Castiel, who instantly wished he was anywhere but there. Gabriel snorted. "What-fucking-ever. I'm done with this. Sorry, I'm not an obedient, faithful, robot, Dad."

Castiel frowned, but Gabriel had already trudged up the stairs with his twin beside him. Their father disappeared into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him. His mother was staring into space, a lost expression on her face. He waited for her to say something, before climbing up the stairs and leaving her to her thoughts.

* * *

The second time Castiel saw Dean Winchester, it was accidental and Castiel almost wished he hadn't witnessed it.

Mrs. Jones who taught Sunday School for the children was an aged women who was adored by all but she was exactly that; an elderly women. And as the years passed by, it became increasingly more difficult for her to attend services, let alone teach a class of rambunctious children. This left Castiel's mother to fill in the position on days Mrs. Jones couldn't teach.

On this particular day in July, Mrs. Novak instructed Castiel to find an old collection of Bible Storybooks that were packed away in the depths of the storage room in the basement. He withheld a sigh and agreed, leaving through the front door so he could enter from the back of the building, which was less crowded an offered an easier access to the basement.

He didn't mean to catch sight of Dean Winchester in a deep conversation with a man who was most likely his father in the back parking lot. He honestly hadn't, it was rare for people park on that side and if his stomach happened to tighten when caught sight of the way the other boy's hair seemed more blond than brown in the direct sunlight; well some things are just coincidental.

Because there was no possible way the other boy could have that sort of effect on Castiel.

He walked briskly around them, his eyes watching the ground he walked on in hope to not detect any attention. His parents told him it was a sin to eavesdrop, so when a few of the sentences reached him he tried not to put any thought into their meaning.

"You promised just one year, Dad. You _promised"_

"And I kept that promise, didn't I? We're staying in one spot, but I never said I'd stop."

"It's not possible to have it both ways. If you can't do it for me, can you at least do it for Sammy? He deserves better than this."

"Am I supposed to sit back and let people die, Dean? Do you expect that of me? I thought I raised you better than that."

"Dad please-"

"No, this conversation is over. Either you want to save people or you would rather they die, at _your _expense. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

"I'm sorry you don't have a glamorous life, Dean. But I thought that this meant something to you. I thought we were on the same page. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I made the wrong choices raising you."

"No, Dad-"

"I'll be inside. Look after your brother."

"Yes sir."

That conversation made little sense to Castiel. But he understood the heartbroken tone in Dean's voice when he spoke to his father. He knew how it felt to not live up to your parent's standards. He had already walked passed Dean, and he was a foot away from the back door now, so he braved a glance at the boy.

The boy was staring in the opposite direction. Even though he was far away, Castiel noticed his slumped shoulders and bent head. His entire posture radiated sorrow.

Castiel felt a stab of guilt, because although it was completely accidental, he had witnessed a very personal moment for the mysterious Dean Winchester.

During the first ten minutes of church, there was a period of time, which the congregation had affectionately nicknamed, "The Meet 'N Greet." They started this procedure a few years ago, when they decided that there wasn't enough social bonding during Sunday morning services. It was an impossibility for the Novaks not to be dragged into a conversation.

Castiel grinned along with his siblings, as he played the part of the respectful son. Most of the people who sat in there section close to the front were elderly women, which was the only reason Castiel disliked it. They were a very talkative, judgmental group.

Behind him, he could clearly hear the women gossiping of the latest sin of the community. His ears perked when he heard his brother's name.

"Their eldest son, Michael is home for the summer. Maybe he can keep the wild one in line-"

"Haven't seen her at a sermon is months-"

"Having an affair-"

"Told his wife he was heading down to Grace Alcove but no one saw him there-"

"Luna Clove is practically brimming with sin-"

"That little harlot wouldn't dare show her face here-"

Castiel rubbed his temples. It was exhausting to listen to them. He leaned back, and realized he had a perfect view of the Winchesters if he tilted his head just the right way. In the different lighting, Castiel noticed Dean had a splatter of freckles across his nose. Castiel found that almost endearing.

"Stop staring," Gabriel said too loudly after kicking him in the shin.

He glared. "I wasn't staring."

"Dude, you so were. Lay off, they aren't the first newcomers we've had, y'know."

"I wasn't staring," He repeated.

Rachael shot him a suspicious look, which Castiel ignored. "Quiet," She mumbled.

Service began with a welcome to the Winchester family, which made Dean fidget nervously and the boy beside him, which Castiel guessed was his younger brother, blush profusely. Castiel couldn't stop the smile that fought it's way to the corner of his mouth.

He tried to pay attention to the sermon. He sang with more enthusiasm than usual. He took notes of what was mentioned into his studybook with precision. He even highlighted verses in his Bible the way Rachael often did. However, his mind wouldn't stop replaying the way Dean Winchester nervously ran his fingers through his hair.

There was something very enthralling about that boy. Castiel couldn't figure it out. Maybe it was the way he spoke to him, like he didn't have to be the perfect adolescent people tried to be around him. He didn't act like Castiel was just a puppet his father used to preach through him. Dean didn't act like anything, he simply _was. _

He liked how the thought practically lifted the pressure off of him. It was...Refreshing. What must it be like, he wondered, to speak with him? To be in his presence for more than a moment? He wondered what the texture of his hair would feel like between Castiel's fingertips.

God should just smite him now with the way his thoughts were heading.

He swallowed, difficulty. His father's eyes shifted to his family as he spoke behind the podium, almost as if he could sense Castiel's sinful thoughts. Keeping his eyes locked on his father, he banished Dean Winchester from his mind.

Hopefully for the last time.


End file.
